Tonight my little community of farong is having a Thanksgiving dinner. I am looking forward to it with a twinge of homesickness. I am really glad we are having Thanksgiving here, because I was really missing the whole holiday season. I made an apple pie for the event. It's strange that baking can be nastalgic. I haven't baked since I got here, and I bake all the time when I am at home. It was fun to bake because it made me really feel like I was preparing for Thankgiving, but it made me miss being in the kitchen with my mom during the holiday season. Thankfully my roomate came back from her weekend get-a-way and joined me in the kitchen. That made it fun. I am quite happy to have her back. She is talking about leaving before Christmas though. That will stink. I really like having her here.
Last night after I finished teaching my evening class I joined with (the other evening ESL teacher) David's class in his going away party. Man, am I going to miss him! I know his students are going to miss him. He's been here almost as long as me, and it feels like he should stay as long as me. Our little group of friends is going to have a huge hole in it when he leaves. Today is his Birthday so we are going to have a little luncheon for him with the evening ESL staff.
I have this issue with getting attatched to people and places, and then leaving them. I can't seem to stay in one place for very long, but I am always homesick for someplace, someone or something. I like it here in Thailand (it took me a while) and I know that when I leave here I am really going to be homesick for this place and these people, but while I am here I am homesick for my home, my family, friends, and culture. I am also homesick for Egypt. I honestly don't know what to do with myself. Right now this is home to me, Over the summer our little apartment in Cairo was home. Before that Virginia was home, and it just keeps going. Of course my parents house is always home to me, but I feel like a splintered person. Part of me is always missing something. I have been at home in so many places that no place feels like it is completely home. I wonder if it will be like this forever.
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4 comments:
I so feel for you right now. That is the way I have been feeling for about 2 years now. There is no place that I can truely call "home", and everywhere that I go, I still feel like I should be someplace else. I hope that you have a great Thanksgiving. I'll drink some apple cider, and eat some of your mom's homemade apple butter for you!
welcome to the Gypsy life. ;-) yeah the holidays make all of us who are away homesick, but home is where the heart is, right? I feel happy that I can call Earth my home rather then just Pennsylvania my home or wherever. I enjoy different places and people, but it would help to balance things out by being home home a little more...
Jeremy my dear, I should be the one welcoming you to the gypsy life.
This is a transitioning time in your life. I traveled growing up and felt at home where ever my family was. When I reach college age, my family stayed put and I left for college. I felt abandoned and diconnected and it was my decision. Even though home was constant and I went home consistantly, it wasn't the same. Holidays were different, relationships were different, it all had changed, as it should. This is a time in your life where you all are in a new phase, but its normal. God designed us to be uncomfortable with home so that we will go and pursuit what He wants for us. Remember Abraham. There will be a time when you will settle down, and it'll feel like home once again. Pursuit what God has for you while you are in your season of singleness, because seasons change.
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